Anti-Gnomeontology 1.0.1

What is and what is not a Gnome?

Gnomes are all the evil in this world and destroyers of all that is good and we hold dear! Gnomes are usually known as those nice little creatures helping Santa and a bit of rascals doing all those nicey-nicey things: Humbug! Utter blasphemy!

Gnomes are to blame for every disaster and even for the smallest of misfortunes we stumble on in our daily lives! They are (unfortunately) living and breathing spawns of the deepest parts of hell, even though they have made Satan as their slave by now and got nothing to do with that part of things in the first place.

What is and what is not a Troll / how they are interconnected?

Trolls used to be somewhat harmless creatures until they (d)evolved to gnomes, no one really knows how that happened but that is the single most horrible event in the history of this planet! What they lost in sheer power they gained in wits and pure malevolence! Evil tongues have whispered that is the same connection with apes and men but that is just blasphemous, our species is the wisest and always has the best of intentions!

How to fight them?

Violence is the solution as it so often is: The more brutal and random the better! We must hunt them down like rabid wolverines and burn them, then burn them again to the perfection! We must not give them any chance to attack us with their Red Magic! They've got horrible ways to control us like possessions and infections and those are just the ways we already know!

Do not let them fool you, they are always after our spleens and even lives if given the chance and even if not!

How many of them there are and what do they do?

We can but guess but even one is too many! According to some very reliable studies they outnumber us!

Their single purpose is to wipe out our species and laugh nastily doing it (it sounds like "Khehehhehehheheheh", if you wondered! On their way to total gnomecide they control us with their gnome-technology and all things nasty and vile!

Gnomes and UFOs?

As everyone knows the grey-ones and gnomes are in cahoots just to destroy us humans! As soon as they are done with us those "poor" aliens shall no doubt be next to go as they will see the true nature of gnomes (and that serves them right for aiding those red cappers)!

We have undeniable evidence that there are huge caves and corridors below ground where they plot and scheme and produce human-gnome hybrids to infiltrate our society! The most famous corridors are to be found from below the pyramids in Egypt, as you must already know. Those two species are the most lethal combination as they learn from each other. Once you have been probed by them you will never be the same again!

Gnomes and oceans?

After gnomes took over Atlantis the oceans have been infested by gnomes and all kinds of hybrids! We should kill everything living in those murky waters to save our species! No lake is too small to be drained! We must fill oceans with plastic and all the good stuff so that the gnomes cannot utilize OUR water!

Say anything you like about gnomes?

I use this last question to remind all of you that there is no grey in this game, just red and more red: Gnomes are evil and they must be destroyed! No mercy must be shown and there is no use for sympathy! Don't let those gnome-liberals and the liberal media to blind you, raise your dung forks and torches and if there is the slightest of suspicion of gnomic activity everything and everyone nearby must be eradicated swiftly!

Some collaterals may occur on our way to the final gnome-solution but everyone must feel proud to die for the cause, I am sure!

We are in the process of writing The Book about these matters (with Thomas Jude Barclay Morrison and P. Emerson Williams) so if you need more info that great piece of art shall answer all of your questions and then some! I believe reading that book should be made mandatory and all the other books should be burned as soon as possible, that would benefit our species greatly!

Hmm, while at it we could burn and destroy all the music that has not been declared  as Anti-Gnomen.... I could volunteer and judge all the music objectively! What a splendid idea, I am on it!

Oh.... Khrm... Just get that book when it is out, be on the safe side of things!

Have the most Anti-Gnomen day: Tonttufindergeneral.

Anti-Gnome Thank You.